What Are Self-Limiting Beliefs, How They Formed And How to Eliminate Them?

What are self-limiting beliefs?

Self-limiting beliefs are the beliefs about some certain topics in which lead you to an incorrect conclusion on that topic.

They are false beliefs and limit yourself to take action or take wrong action without self-awareness because you believe what you are doing is correct.

Beliefs are very powerful and they influence you in the way you speak and behave, and all these done subconsciously.

You don't even realize you're wrong when you have limiting beliefs; you may have a good plan, but you fail to execute it because of self-limiting beliefs. You may just overgeneralize the failure is because you have bad luck or other excuses.

This is bad for you.

Self-limiting beliefs become a roadblock on your way to becoming successful. If you don't realize the limiting beliefs that you have in the area that you want to succeed in, chances are you'll always fail without knowing reasons.

You may eventually believe your goal can't be achieved because you've tried for many times and it never succeed.

Chances are the fruit of success is around the corner, but you give up right before the destination. Therefore, you should concern is there any limiting beliefs that holding you back to be successful.

How self-limiting beliefs are formed?

Limiting beliefs can be formed through the influences of others or even yourself.

Before you want to try something new that you never touch before, perhaps you'll tend to listen to other's opinions.

Since you've zero experience about that thing, chances are what they said will be one of the considering points for you to make decisions. 

When comes to new thing, topic, skill, game, you name it, it's just like you arrived a new country. You don't speak that country's language, you don't know about their cultures, religions, background, current situation and people.

You'll be missing and lost direction in that country if you're not with maps and compass. So what do you do if you want to find the way out to your destination?

You can find a guide to help throughout your journey in that country. However, what if that guide told you that due to the peak tourist season, there's only 5 stars hotel is available and it exceeds much of your budget for this travelling?

But you've no choice, you've to pay it because you don't know where else to find you a low cost and fit-in-your-budget hotel.

You give up to find opportunities to get a low-cost hotel.

If you buy a handbook and the book wrote that, people in that country are poor, politic unstable and their economics is really bad. Would you still decide to travel to that country after you read this? Does it give you a bad impression about that country?

Most people will follow what the guide and handbook said because we lack the information on the topic that we need to know. It's exactly the same how other people influence our beliefs and develop self-limiting beliefs.

When you've decided to lay off your 9-5 job and build your own business, people tell you that it's impossible to build your own business at this economic condition.

They tell you that you must fail your business eventually, and even show you some examples of how others fail their business. Then you may believe that, now really is not the right time for you to start your business, it's better to hold back for a while.

Let's have another example here, if a guy failed with women for many times, he may develop new limiting beliefs to himself that he's unattractive or even ugly. In fact, he's an attractive guy and that's not his fault lead to the failure with women.

When the first time he failed with women, he just thought that particular woman doesn't love him. For the second time, he started to doubt that he's unattractive to women. When comes to the third time, he convince himself that he's unattractive and women dislike him.

He believes he is ugly and set limiting beliefs to himself that he'll never succeed with women easily because of his appearance. See also 7 limiting beliefs about love in men

How to eliminate self-limiting beliefs?

Limiting beliefs have to be removed so then only you could break through your comfort zone. As mentioned before beliefs are very important because they will influence your attitudes and behaviors.

If you don't get rid of the limiting beliefs about a certain area, chances are you'll keep making the same mistakes and never succeed in it.

It's foolish when you keep doing the wrong ways and expecting it will come out a good result. Once you remove the limiting beliefs, you'll know what suppose to do to achieve your goal, then you will be on the right track.

Here are some ways to remove your limiting beliefs.

Get more information

Your limiting beliefs formed when you don't understand well about the topic. You believe what the handbook and guide told you because you don't know anything about the country.

Although they're cheating on you, but you still take their words as the truth and rules since you have no idea about the country.

It's very easy to be influenced by others when you know nothing and easily believe what others said. 

Therefore, you can do more researches on the related topic before you start to believe anything. So then you won't create any limiting beliefs because you know what are the truth.

Read news from internet about that country, is the economic there really so bad like what noted in the handbook? Ask the local people is there no more cheap hotel before you believe what the guide told you.

The more you know about the topic, the less limiting beliefs will be created.


Acknowledgement helps you to avoid the creation of limiting beliefs. When you face a problem, acknowledge to yourself that you don't really know what is the root problem, you don't know the ways to correct your problems.

Don't assume you know everything. It's normal you don't know something even if it's only a trivial thing. See how to know if you have limiting beliefs or not.

If you don't be honest with yourself to acknowledge that you know less thing about the topic and you insist want to make decisions with guessing, chances are you will create self-limiting beliefs to yourself.

For instance, if you don't admit that you don't know how to deal with women, and you don't change yourself and keep approaching women with wrong ways, chances are you will create limiting beliefs such as it's hard to be successful with women, women are weird animal, you're unattractive, etc.

Don't create reason to explain things

This is one of the most popular ways how self-limiting beliefs are created.

When things aren't explainable - it's not discovered yet or lacking knowledge and information - there are gaps to complete the whole idea.

So people find or create reasons themselves to explain the gaps of information of the issues. Sometimes the created reasons become limiting beliefs on the respective topic.

For example, you don't understand why women turn you off. So you try to explain this to yourself by creating some reasons that you can accept.

You think women turn you off must be because you're not wealthy, women like wealthy guys who can provide and support a good life for her. So you feel satisfied and relieved because you found the answer why women turn you off. 

However, that's not the real answer, that's only the reason you created to explain what's unexplainable.

You'll set a limiting belief to yourself that women love money, so if you want to be successful with women, you need to be wealthy. This is all wrong. See: Does money attract women?

About the author


Rio Yee is the Founder of WealthyLoveLife and is super passionate about helping people change their mind and take action to improve your important areas in life such as dating & relationships, personal finance and productivity.


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