You Have The Obligation To Create Your Own Lifestyle

Yes, as a real man you have the obligation to create your own lifestyle.

A real man lives his life consciously. He chooses his own life path instead of letting others choose for him.

Honestly, this article has another headline - Why should you believe that I can help you?

The idea of this article actually was stimulated by one of my university tutors in a Business Ethics tutorial class. He asked me to answer why money is important. So I told him money is important to sustain a person's lifestyle.

After that he loudly replied to my answer impolitely that he disagreed with me. Obviously, he didn't like the answer. Maybe it's too general. Or maybe he thought he could live a lifestyle that doesn't need any money.

However, that's not the end. He claimed that he is a highly educated person, I don't need to tell him that money can sustain a person's lifestyle. He said this implied that I'm an uneducated person.

So I thought about it. He is a lecturer and a tutor and I'm his student. So he is more educated than me, I accept this fact. But does it really represent that if I tell something general to an educated person means I'm uneducated?

He further told me that what I said was only an opinion, but not a knowledge. He kept repeating he is knowledgeable so he must always right.

Then later I thought about my website. I'm just an ordinary man, like you and others. How can I teach things on my website without holding any certificate to prove that I'm educated on the topics?

And you are educated. You are a college student, or already graduated. Why should you believe what I say?

Why should you believe that I can help you?

At this moment, a philosophy topic kicks into my mind - what knowledge actually is?

What is knowledge?

Why should you bother with what knowledge is?

There are two reasons. First, you will know the big picture of knowledge so you have the ability to always improve yourself. Second, this perfectly explains that why I can help you and you could believe in me.

So I have done some researches about knowledge.

There's a branch of philosophy concerned with knowledge which is Epistemology, also referred to as "theory of knowledge".

Here's a diagram represents the definition of knowledge.

Classical definition of knowledge.

From the diagram you can see that knowledge is acquired when truths and beliefs are overlapped. In other words, when a belief is justified as a truth it can be considered as knowledge.

But you can see that not all overlapped regions are knowledge. Only the yellow circle region can be considered as knowledge.

How about the purple (poorly justified beliefs) region? I will say about it later.

When I did the research I found there are many branches or 'tendencies' within epistemology. Two most popular branches are they believe knowledge is either gaining by experience or by the internal world. I studied most of them, and after digesting I have my own views on it.

From my viewpoint I think truths, beliefs, and knowledge exist independently. You can get either one of them by combining two others together under an allowed condition.

Therefore, they are interconnected, they influence each other, they can't form if either one of them is missing.

Here's the relationship between truths, beliefs, and knowledge.

The relationship between truths, beliefs, and knowledge.

Truths + Beliefs = Knowledge

You can refer back to the diagram.

The truths are equivalent to evidence. And the beliefs are from one's belief system. When what you believe is being proved it is workable, it becomes a knowledge.

So you are able to teach others the knowledge because you have evidence (can be many types like your own observation, your own experience, people's experience, etc) and you really believe in it.

However, not all knowledge is admitted by scientists as knowledge because it may not able to prove in a scientific way like experiments. The belief lacked justification. That kind of knowledge (poorly justified) is laid on the purple region.

I give you an example.

  • Statement A - Men have moustaches.
  • Statement B - My father has moustaches.
  • So statement C - My father is a man. ✔
  • But if the statement B is - My mother has moustaches.
  • So statement C - My mother is a man. ✘

This cannot be considered as knowledge by scientist because there's no justification to prove only men and all men have moustaches.

Even though in a general sense that we know the statement A does make sense, but it's not necessary, so it's a wrong knowledge.

And we intuitively don't believe our own mother is a man, there's no belief in it. So no knowledge can form in anyway.

Truths + Knowledge = Beliefs

When you have a knowledge and you have evidence to prove it's right. It will form you a belief.

The sources of knowledge have many, not only can get from beliefs + evidence. You may gain the knowledge from school, from your parents, from a book, from a online course, from a website and the list goes on.

But they won't become your beliefs until you have evidence about the knowledge.

For example, when a book says a crocodile can live in saltwater you don't believe it initially. Until you see the video of saltwater crocodile on the YouTube and the newspaper reported one man killed by saltwater crocodile you only believe it exists.

In my previous article about limiting beliefs I explained that when you have repetitively told yourself a false fact and kept seeing the evidence you will ingrain that fact in your mind as a belief eventually.

For example, when you think rich men are selfish, and your rich friend is being known as a selfish guy, you'll start believe it even though that's just a thought at the beginning.

This is very dangerous because if you have wrong/limiting beliefs, it will affect the rest of your life unless you eliminate them and change to empowering beliefs.

Therefore, it's important to get the right knowledge.

When you learn wrong knowledge your subconscious mind will filter out the information that are contrary to it even though it's a right information, and will find the information that can support the wrong knowledge as evidence, so in the end you believe in it and create yourself a wrong belief.

In other words, if you have limiting beliefs you'll keep yourself away from what is right and keep making mistakes that are obviously wrong unconsciously.

Beliefs + Knowledge = Truths

As just mentioned truths are equivalent to evidence, they also mean action.

When you learn a knowledge and believe in it, you will change your behavior to align with it. Or vise versa, when you have a belief, you'll consciously or unconsciously find information about the belief and your behavior changes so not against with the belief.

For example, when in primary school you learn that we must study hard to get good academic result in order to have a bright future, and you believe in it.

So you decrease your playing time and study longer.

Since you have a belief that the academic can determine your future, you'll find ways to improve your study efficiency and quality. When you come across a method to score better in examinations, you'll automatically be interested in it and want to learn it.

So you decrease the time on unproductive things and study smart to get more done.

Let's wrap up all these three equations.

  • When beliefs meet the evidence, they become your knowledge.
  • When you have knowledge before beliefs, your subconscious mind finds evidence for you so the knowledge become beliefs.
  • When you have a belief, your subconscious mind will find information and evidence to support it and filter out everything that goes against with it, this shapes your behavior.
  • And back to the first equation, your behavior aka evidence changed and support your beliefs so you acquire knowledge. New behavior and/or new belief will acquire new knowledge.

You can see it's a cycle, my friend. These three elements are really interconnected. They will pin down each other.

If you have wrong beliefs or wrong knowledge or wrong behavior, you can get yourself into a vicious cycle.

That's why people are frustrated in life. That's why people are suffering. That's why people are making the same mistakes all the time.

Now let's talk about the purple region.

There are things out of our controlling.

The purple region is where can't actually find justification for the belief.

Because there are many factors are out of expected and uncontrollable.

Let's see some examples here.

  1. Facebook failed to acquire Snapchat so it tried to create a clone, and the clone failed.
  2. Microsoft attempted to replicate iPod by creating Microsoft Zune, and it failed.
  3. Google tried to copy Facebook twice by creating two products, Orkut and Google plus, but no one succeeded.

What's the reason these companies failed to copy the success?

Is that they do not have the knowledge?

No, these companies are resourceful. They have money, they have talents, they have anything that needs to be successful.

But why they fail to defeat their competitors?

They do have knowledge, they do have evidence and experience, they do know the truths of success. But they still have things uncontrollable, the purple region is where these things located at.

In my free ebook success made certain I explained that everything is connected everything. One thing that's seemingly unrelated can have a relation to another thing.

For example, the experience of traveling to poor countries can ignite the heart of being empathy. Travel is unrelated to empathy on the surface, and no knowledge or science can prove they are certainly connected.

This phenomena is also called as causal chain. Google, Facebook, and Microsoft do not lack of any resource, but they still can fail. We don't have any resource, but we still can win.

There's a series of previous action causes the different outcome even if it's done with exactly the way how other successful people did.

Not only your action, but also others' action, and natural phenomena like weather can also influence the outcome. In other words, even if your belief is true and justified, there's still exception.

For example, you know how to build a successful business, there's a step-by-step method for you to copy, but the outcome is not certain. Because there are different conditions to everyone such as different people, personalities and situations will influence the outcome here and there. That's why the path to success is not linear.

All people have a different causal chain. There's a different term that most people more familiar with - luck.

So you should ingrain empowering beliefs and eliminate limiting ones, learn the correct knowledge, and guide your behavior. Then you'll create a good causal chain.

In other words, you will create good luck. Then the chances to be successful will dramatically increase.

The personal boundary is the basic block to create your own lifestyle.

So now about how to create your own lifestyle.

You need to have the beliefs about who you will gonna be.

What is your life purpose? Why are you born in this world? Why you want to be an entrepreneur?

You need to know the BIG WHY.

When you know the BIG WHY you will seek for the information you needed and you will take action without any willpower because your inner drive naturally drives you to do so.

So that when you have beliefs (aka mindset) your behavior will change. You will know what you should do and what you shouldn't. You will know what's the limitation of a certain behavior.

In other words, you know where the boundary is.

In my free ebook attract women with personal boundaries I explained what's the boundary you should have in order to avoid deadly mistakes and increase your attractiveness.

That means by having good personal boundaries you will develop a good attitude and construct the lifestyle that helps you to be successful with women naturally.

So what's your BIG WHY? Why you need to be successful?

My BIG WHY to learn dating and relationships is because I want to stop failing with women. So I have personal boundaries about this realm.

I will not do things that harm my image. I will not behave like a nice guy. I do things that make me attractive. I workout to build muscles daily. I won't spend all my time on entertainment and the list goes and goes on.

I live a lifestyle that constantly improve myself.

That all start with your BIG WHY, aka your beliefs.

Everyone has his or her own ideology of things or even has nothing in mind.

When you are knowledgeable, you'll accumulate your knowledge in a systematic way. That will be your ideology.

However, ideology is not equal to knowledge/science, even though it is developed based on many knowledge.

Because knowledge will never wrong independently but when linking them together many uncontrollable factors will be taking part in it.

Furthermore, if the knowledge is formed through false beliefs, the subconscious mind will find evidence to support the wrong beliefs. Hence, an ideology constructed by wrong knowledge undoubtedly will fail.

All people's ideology can be wrong, even mines.

However, most today's men have no any ideology in mind because they don't have a belief that inspires them to learn knowledge and take action to improve daily.

They don't have enough knowledge. They lack experience. They don't have a life purpose.

That's why most today's men lost their identity.

They just follow the life path by listening to parents' advice or social influential. They lost the art to create their own lifestyle.

So even though there are uncontrollable things affect the outcome and the knowledge can be wrong, but ideology can still be reliable because it's at least based on believable knowledge to some degree.

But ideology has a bias - It's too strict, it's not flexible at all.

If one person follows an ideology completely, he can't adapt to the changes, he will insist on using the ways that suit to the ideology.

The point that we want to acquire a knowledge is we want to gain the values from knowledge.

When learning new things most of us are not just want to know facts, but we want to make knowledge more valuable than mere true beliefs.

In other words, most of us don't care about the knowledge is scientific or not but more care about the value it gives us.

If the knowledge is applicable and gets the result that we want, who care it's scientific or not.

Now back to the ideology.

Like mentioned above, we have a lot of factors around us influence the outcome. People called them luck.

But ideology is inflexible. It's fixed and not allowed to change.

So the ideology has a high rate of failure due to the inability to adapting changes.

Luckily there is still one better approach responding to things more flexible and doable, which is philosophy.

Ideology Philosophy
 A set of beliefs and rules belonging to a particular group or set of people.  A pragmatic approach of looking and analyzing life.
 Is born out of a vision for the future and aims at changing the current state to that particular vision.  Aims at understand the world as it exists.
 Is dogmatic and refuses to participate in any discussion that does not agree with that ideology.  Is objective.
 Aims at spreading the beliefs and imposing them on the rest of the society irrespective of its relevance.  Does not have as much impact as an ideology would have on the world.
 All ideologies have some underlying philosophy.  No philosophy have some underlying ideologies.

The difference between ideology and philosophy.

To give you a more clear vision on what does the value of knowledge mean, I drew a diagram.

The value of knowledge.

The fact is people change their internal world (aka belief system) and mental state of believing from time to time.

Which means that the knowledge you acquired today may not serve for you several months or years later. The knowledge now you learn may be invaluable to you in the future.

In future, you may need to upgrade your knowledge, you may want to learn new knowledge.

Ideology is fixed. Learn the ideology of unsuccessful people you will fail. Learn the ideology of successful people you will fail for times too because there are many uncontrollable factors will influence the outcome, the path to success is not linear.

Even if you follow your own ideology you can fail too because you don't upgrade and learn new knowledge.

So I don't learn ideology. I don't likely construct ideology. I don't teach ideology. My website isn't an ideology.

Even though in the Homepage I said I would offer the step-by-step guides to help you succeed in life. But these step-by-step guides are not fixed. I'm not promoting ideology.

The philosopher Linda Zagzebski said if you have a true belief achieved through an unreliable process, there's no particular reason that has less value than one produced through a reliable process.

The point is the value of knowledge you gain, no matter it's scientifically proven or not. The value will always be the same.

My concern is giving the values that you and I as a man craves for. We want to build a successful business, we want to succeed with women, we want to be an alpha male, so and so on.

I use my own experience and knowledge to teach you the beliefs that you should develop. I give you all the information and tools you need to know and even give you the action guide.

But you are the one who apply all these and create your own lifestyle.

I'm not teaching you some fixed methods.

What I'm teaching is philosophy instead of ideology. Even if I have taught an ideology, that would derived from my philosophy.

Every man has his taste. Philosophy is a taste. In other words, philosophy is simply someone's opinion on how to do something.

For examples, the philosophy of life, the philosophy of bodybuilding, the philosophy of dating and women.

There's nothing right or wrong. It's just an opinion.

And my philosophy is based on the applicable knowledge, the trial and error, and the value we can get.

So when you are learning something from me, you are actually learning my philosophy of the thing.

Philosophy is flexible, it's debatable, it always has room to improve.

I may change my philosophy of something after learning new knowledge or gaining new experiences. I may change my thoughts on something I was deeply believed in.

Therefore, I welcome criticism. I'm willing to hear your opinion. We can exchange thoughts in order to improve our mindset.

To make it clear, the intention of creating this website is teaching my philosophy of things to you and you will develop your own philosophy instead of teaching my ideology of things and you exactly copy them without your own thought process and analytic.

So you will create your own lifestyle. You will have a unique life path you create for yourself.

This article is my confession how could I help you and you could believe in me. I don't brainwash you like many other self-help gurus just to sell you the products they create.

I want you to live a wealthy love life. I want you to live the life consciously.

Be your best self and live your best life.


Difference Between Philosophy And Ideology
Philosophy vs. Ideology
Science, Ideology, and Philosophy
Is Science an Ideology?
Relationship between ideology and science.
Dialectical materialism

About the author


Rio Yee is the Founder of WealthyLoveLife and is super passionate about helping people change their mind and take action to improve your important areas in life such as dating & relationships, personal finance and productivity.


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